


A Parting Glass

by Mareel



Series: Alone [9]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Christmas, Drinking, Friendship, Loneliness, M/M, Mass Effect 2, Mass Effect Holiday Special, Memories, Pre-Relationship, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-01
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-13 20:45:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9141538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mareel/pseuds/Mareel
Summary: Shepard decides he doesn't want to drink alone on Christmas eve.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place near the end of ME2 on the _Normandy SR-2_. 
> 
> It makes reference to a Christmas party on the original _Normandy _two years earlier (__[A Very Normandy Christmas](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9076723)) and to events there on the night before the mission to Ilos ([Before Ilos](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5757676)).  
>   
>  Written for the Mass Effect Holiday Special 2016 Day 9 - Making Spirits Bright  
> 

 

It’s easy to lose track of time out here. Weeks or months slip by before you think to ask yourself what month is this anyway.

I probably wouldn’t even have known it was nearly Christmas if Chambers hadn’t done her bit of decorating with the mistletoe hung by the elevators. But now that I know, it’s hard to get it out of my mind.

I pour the last dram from the nearly empty bottle of TIM’s finest scotch, swallowing it quickly enough that I barely even taste it. _I’ll slow down now_ , I tell myself, as i cross the room to the desk drawer that serves as a liquor cabinet. It’s almost empty… only a couple bottles left of the good stuff. Good thing this mission is going to end soon, one way or the other. Just a few ends to wrap up before we attempt the Omega relay.

I break open one of the bottles and am just about to pour another drink when I realize I really don’t want to be here drinking alone on Christmas eve. But I’m not sure who would want to share a drink with me this late at night _and_ understand why I want to do it. Actually I do know, but he’s not here. 

The whiskey isn’t suitable for the _dextro_ folks and I think it might take a human for the understanding part. Names scroll down in my mind until I find one one that feels right. Gathering up the bottle and a couple of shot glasses, I head for the crew deck.

The mess is empty at this hour and I pause for a moment, worried that it might be too late for anyone to be awake who isn’t on third shift duty. But there’s a light on in the medbay, so I knock lightly before entering.

“Dr. Chakwas? Good to see I’m not the only night owl on this ship.“

She turns from the pile of data pads on her desk and waves me in. “The only insomniac you mean?”

“Maybe.” I take the chair next to her desk and bring out the bottle and glasses. “I was just wondering if you might share a little Christmas cheer with me.”

She looks at him for a moment before nodding her head. “I’m glad it’s not a medical emergency anyway. But it does appear that you’ve started without me.”

I assume she smelled it on my breath. I really hadn’t had that much. “Yeah, but then I decided that I didn’t want to be drinking alone on Christmas eve”

“I’m flattered that you thought of me..”

“I think I wanted to spend the time with someone who understood why I didn’t want to be alone and maybe someone who would remember the last Christmas I can remember. That would have been on the old _Normandy_ …

She nods, thinking back. “The party that Ashley and Joker organized? With the mistletoe and the sweaters? Of course I remember. That would have been over two years ago for me. But for you…” Her voice trails off as she reaches for one of the glasses. “Pour me some of that, if you please.”

I pour two glasses, remembering the last time she and I shared a few drinks. “This isn’t the fancy brandy that you like, but it’s the Illusive Man’s finest.”

“It will do, Commander.”

I raise my glass to her with the first toast that comes to mind. “To absent friends.”

She meets my eyes and touches her glass to mine before downing it as quickly as I do mine and then gesturing to the bottle for a refill.

“I think I do want to drink and remember that party… You and Kaidan in those matching hanar sweaters…”

“I didn’t need to remember that part… those were awful.”

She takes a sip of the scotch, actually tasting it this time. “This isn’t bad. It should do nicely.” Leaning back in her chair, she picks up her train of thought, slipping into reminiscence. “You two really fed the rumor mill that night.”

I swallow a little too quickly and sputter a cough. “Sorry… but there wasn’t anything… It’s not what you think…”

She interrupts me. “Commander… Shepard, I know it’s not. But that didn’t keep people from speculating after a few beers. And I’m fairly certain at least one of you _wished_ it was.”

I suddenly feel stone cold sober. “What? How do you know that?”

She shrugs a shoulder and takes another sip. “It’s not exactly doctor patient confidentiality, but it’s close enough that I can’t tell you that. Let’s just say I don’t miss much that patients might say when they’re asleep or drowsy from pain meds.”

Before I can say anything she continues. Her voice softens and she touches my hand for a moment. .“And maybe not just one of you had that wish?”

Another drink is in order and I offer her another as well, which she accepts, apparently determined not to let me outdrink her.

“Shepard, I saw you the night before Ilos… If i could have brought Lt Alenko out of that migraine haze, I surely would have. You were each so worried about the other.”

“Ilos… yeah.” 

I take a sip of the scotch, letting the amber spirits roll across my tongue and fill my mouth with its smoky heat, feeling it burn a little as it goes down. And I think back to that night, when I desperately needed to talk to someone who could hear me air my doubts about the mission, but reassure me we were doing the right thing. Someone who wouldn’t view that doubt as a sign of weakness or lack of purpose. In a word, Kaidan. 

But he was down with a migraine, and I was concerned about how bad it must be for him to have asked for medical help in dealing with it. “ I hated knowing that I couldn’t help him through it, you know? He’d helped me so many times…”

Her voice is quiet and she doesn’t sound drunk at all. “After you visited him in Medbay, he seemed to be less restless and fell asleep for several hours. It seems you did help him, Shepard."

“That’s good to know.” 

I set my glass down next to the bottle, not really wanting to drink any more right now.. There’s a silence that goes on a little too long. I take a long breath and shift from memories into reality.

"But that’s over. Cerberus made sure of that – getting me to work with them. Kaidan would never work with Cerberus. He made that very clear. But the Alliance wasn’t interested in getting to the bottom of the threat posed by the Collectors and the Reapers… so here we are.”

“And this is another night where you need to talk. The situation has its similarities to just before Ilos does it not?”

I hadn’t actually made that connection, but it’s possible. “Yeah, in some ways. It might be a suicide mission, and I’m asking everyone to trust me about it being the right thing to do.”

She nods, swirling the last of the liquid in her glass, but putting it down before drinking it. “I don’t have Kaidan’s tactical experience, but I keep my ears open to what the crew is saying. And they’re with you. Seeing what happened to the colonists on Horizon… they want it stopped.”

“No more than I do.” We could sit here drinking and reminiscing for hours, but I should let her get some sleep. I consider one more drink, but make it a small one. Raising my glass to her, I offer a last toast. 

“To Christmas, past and future, Karin. Peace on Earth might be a long shot, but we’re going to go for it.”

“To Christmas, Shepard.”

 


End file.
